Good Girl

According to multiple men, I’m a certain “type” of girl. Forget my inherent need to create or my Ivy League education or my love of animals or my personality in general. Apparently, none of those things are necessary tidbits of information when it comes to defining who I am: the Good Girl.

At this moment in time, I have 1012 matches on Tinder. This is after deleting thousands of past matches. At this point in my experiment, I’d guess I’ve had well over 10,000 total matches. Word to the wise – only swiping right on every single photo will get you these kind of numbers. But just so you know, it isn’t worth it. If this blog isn’t proof enough that most of these people are terrible, read on for more.

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It’s true that Tinder is essentially an app to find a hook-up. While I know plenty of people who have gone on dates with a Tinder match, it’s clear that the dude had very specific intentions for the end of the evening. This isn’t just about men, though. I’ve heard of plenty of women with the same intentions. However, it seems that males dominate when it comes down to which gender wants Tinder sex the most.  Men are animals.

The number of sexual requests I’ve received is astronomical. Women are too sensitive and kind to send tons of messages like that. Right? Maybe not. I have no idea because unfortunately, I wasn’t lucky enough to be born with the bisexual or lesbian gene. Sometimes I wish I was after talking to all these dudes with misogynistic ‘tudes, though.

I’m not sure how a guy could possibly look at my profile and automatically think I’m not down to clown. This is what my profile looks like to every bro who comes across it:

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Nothing about this profile screams “chaste” or “prude” to me. It’s your typical online dating selfie with a brief and bitchy tagline that gives almost zero information about me. However, something about this profile must scream “NO SEX PLEASE” to some of the more “astute” guys.

ending things early

not a hookup

So what do I look like? The marrying type? The religious type? Both? And all based on that one photo?

Look, I’m not complaining here. I have no interest in casual Tinder hook-ups. I don’t even want to meet any of these guys in person unless there’s something radically special about them (which is highly unlikely, at least when the only information I have is their Tinder profile). I just can’t figure out why some dudes immediately sign me off as a potential one-night-stand based on this photograph. Every girl I know gets the sexual requests, but I don’t know anyone else who has received a message like the two above.

The only thing I can imagine is that other Tinder females are looking mighty sexual in their pictures. I have a shirt on in mine. Maybe that’s what makes me such a good girl.

I will say that I’m generally good. I did all my homework when I was in school (well, college was another story). I make my bed every day. I call my mom to say hi. Do these things make me a good girl? Or can guys sniff out my awkward teenage years? Is it that obvious that I didn’t touch a boy (barring an occasional hug or high five) until I was nineteen? It’s embarrassing, sure, but I can’t imagine it’s that apparent. However, maybe all of these things make me into that good girl in my profile picture. Perhaps some guys can just sense the prude in me.

All of this aside, I think it’s time for a new Tinder photo and profile, just for the sake of experimentation. Will a bikini photo change these guys’ minds? Stay tuned, because I’m about to try and find out.

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One response to “Good Girl

  1. Pingback: Good Girl | Ok, Stupid | TinderNews

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