Post #300

Took me long enough to get to the 300th post. Blame my lack of interest in online dating for this far overdue milestone. But, I mean, can you blame me for giving up? I now have 300 posts to back up the decision.

For now, the only apps I’m interested are the ones that I eat before dinner and dessert.

By the way, I feel like the guy below may actually be interested in men based on this little fantasy he wrote. Just me?

screen-shot-2015-04-22-at-10-02-09-am

 

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unborn offspring

I just threw up everywhere.

IMG_7801

Don’t you dare.

no fontin

Hope that worked out for you. Straight up, no “fontin”.

pack of nerds

Help.

jessica alba

Well, at least it started off nicely.

IMG_6540

Didn’t know one could look dick-deficient.

rude man 1I just threw up on my iPhone.

Psh, Amateurs

I’ve gotten way worse messages than these.

cockAbsolutely no one wants to be spoken to this way unless otherwise stated. Kinky and consensual partners, have at it. But men of the world: don’t speak to me this way. Ever.

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