oral reciprocation


smile every day


I’m not sure if that’s such a great idea. I don’t smile that much.


I actually wore a scoliosis brace in my adolescence. Please don’t make me break it back out of the closet at my parents’ house. I don’t think I can live with that shame again.


Fun fact: I will never turn down an offer to be on the receiving end of a financial transaction. But that’s the only thing I’m willing to be on the receiving end of so please don’t get confused.

marry fuck kill

This is deep.

do battle

Trust me, he’s not worth it.

nicely hungOh, ok.



Pretty sure I can do all of that without you if you know what I mean.

Screen Shot 2015-02-06 at 5.49.35 PM

Found this in the “Other” inbox in my Facebook messages. I haven’t gotten any less single since he sent it a year and a half ago so maybe I should go for it.

booty booty



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