do battle

Trust me, he’s not worth it.


Pretty sure I can do all of that without you if you know what I mean.



Screen Shot 2015-01-18 at 11.15.12 PM

Oh honey, don’t send that message more than once. It was embarrassing enough the first time 😦

hey hi hey

Attention Men: This is a painfully boring way to message someone on Ok Cupid. Unless you want to be ignored, get creative and tell me how pretty I am!

kutie kelly

Is it just me or is this insanely creepy?

u seem boring

Terrible pick-up line.

Remember that time I used this photo as my profile picture and was subsequently one of the most popular people on Ok, Cupid?


Well I forgot about one guy’s message in response to this very accurate photograph of me.

shallow hal gag

I now aspire to 1) be a “really advanced user” of the site and 2) find someone who eats only pets. Wish me luck on this quest!


tinder sparksSigh.

body type

No one has ever told me they like my body type before.


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